Have you ever wondered

Have you ever wondered if anyone would miss you if you were gone? I'd lie if I said I've never thought about it. The truth is, those words cross my mind quite often. There are a lot of people I'd miss if they left, but in my mind I doubt they'd do the same for me. 

            Have you ever wondered how long it would take before someone realised you were missing? That you're not there anymore. The sad truth is that whenever these thoughts cross my mind, I feel so sad. Sad that this is how my life turned out. Alone, where a handful days - at best - would pass before anyone would even start to wonder. Wonder where I am, why I'm not there. 
            Sometimes, out of curiosity, I'd like to quit all communication, keep the lights out in my apartment, never go out and see how long it would take. Have you ever thought about this? If you haven't - bless you! That means you are surrounded by friends that keep you close, that loves you and get worried by the slightest thing. It might even irritate you at times. But the truth is, you're really blessed! If you on the other hand have thought about this - I feel you! Even if I don't know you and therefore won't realise when you're gone, feel sad or something like that - I'm right here with you. You're never alone. 
            Like the Angel who once spoke to me - I'm not alone, I'm never alone. I can choose to always have love by my side. So can you. I chose, and even if the world hasn't changed and it still might take days before anyone realises I'm gone or isolating myself, but there will always be one person who will move mountains to find me, reaching through the darkness I've surrounded myself with. Because he loves me. When I hurt, he hurts. All he wants to do is love me and hold me in his arms. 
            Have you ever wondered if anyone would miss you if you were gone? I have.